Wondering

wondering why

my wife doesn’t stray

very far

every day

into her car she hops

goes out and shops

buying new

shifts

me an

old

tight-wad

stiff

she

watches

movies on

women’s

cable

channel

where men are perfect

never hard to handle

saying the right things

reading their script

gotta’ get a grip

it’s a benefit

swinging like a monkey

tree to tree

why

everyone below

laughs at me

I’ll never know

still love her so

short on dough

what little I reaped

I must have sowed

being married

got me in the

know

often

enough

though

you wonder

why things go

they go the way they go

oh no

brick on big toe

three honkies

Larry, Curly and Moe

tied the knot at shot gun pew

twenty years ago

father in law decided

was the gentlemanly thing to do

she never forgets

the slightest bit

your tit is in a ringer

you’re

in deep

s _ _ t

you’re busted

caught in the act

it’s a real zinger

like today at work

you chose an easy

hacker password

your computer got

hacked

better get your act together

fast

better git’

that’s a fact

take it on the chin

you take the cake

tryin’ hard to grin

through thick and thin

bear it all

suck it up

like China man

Chan

guzzle half bottle rot-gut gin

you know you kin’

it’s after six

YOU

better call quick

take your licks

goanna be late

that special dinner

on the table

I T

awaits

cold on your plate

supper bell ringing

she’s a callin’ your cell phone’s

a DINGIN’

kept it all together

through sunny and rainy weather

but

you slipped and fell

when you get home you’re goin’ straight to hell

while last night you slept

under a drunken spell

she went through your

old

Iphone

JUNK

you old skunk

online gambling

wagered in haste

she saw all

that money you waste

feelin’ like a punk

you thought you

HID

all the funk

ten bar hopping

tabs

you forgot you

done

DID

dad

when you passed out

in that yellow cab

SID

picked you off the ground

lost and found

the one your wife hates

always makes you go home

l  a  t  e

your

F  A  T  E

around

the next corner

is

in

W A I T

man alive

for goodness

S A K E S…

ground’s

a shakin’

you’re goanna sizzle like bacon

you walk in the front door

and there she stands

arms crossed

she’s not fakin’

it’s the next

San Andreas

quake

you’re already half baked

but

it doesn’t even come close to all the

friggin’ amends you’re

goanna have to make…

for some time

until you gain

that woman’s trust

back

once

AGAIN

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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About Steven Humphreys

I live in 'sunny' California with my lovely wife, three wonderful cats and very handsome dog! I write a lot these days about different subjects I have a 'heartfelt and deep-seated' interest in. I surely hope you will find my articles 'interesting and informative' as well. I sincerely appreciate your interest and you are welcome to visit here as often as you'd like. You can read more 'about me' within this site. Thank you for visiting!
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