The Eyes Have it
Went to a shrink about thirty years ago.
Barney who had a PhD.
I really liked him, he was a great guy.
He was also a professor at USC or UCLA.
I don’t remember which university.
Anyway, he told me I was a Putzer
(I guess he should know what a putzer was, being he was Jewish?)
And, he said there was a lot to be said that was good about one.
so, I believed it was a compliment.
I also asked him for a diagnosis.
He said I was Neurotic.
I was able to live with that
Maybe, still do.
Why else would I write anything at all?
Being neurotic is a great motivator.
Although, I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it.
The downside is depression.
I feel OK.
I don’t twitch or anything like that.
I didn’t know exactly what that meant that Barney said, so I looked it up
(I looked up putzer, but at the same time I also looked up Neurotic)
The word ‘Fool’ and ‘Do nothing’ came up for putzer.
The word ‘Mentally Ill’ also came up for neurotic.
neither one sounded too good to me.
He also said my father needed ‘One swift kick!’
I thought that sounded pretty good.
Who doesn’t go to a shrink?
You might as well know about me so you can judge me.
Of course, I don’t go now.
I figure, I’ll just figure things out on my own.
that seems to work out fine.
I get by that way.
I don’t even have to drink or use drugs.
and, I eat a lot more fruits and veggies than I used to
Not so much on any processed foods or snacks.
Very low salt, sugar and oils.
I would tell you if I was still seeing a therapist or not.
that was a long time ago.
I can’t seem to keep a secret for long.
My father told me I was
‘too smart for my own good.’
Was that because he couldn’t manipulate me into doing
I don’t know, I just took it as a compliment at the time.
(anyway, how could being too smart for your own good be a bad thing?)
Who doesn’t go to a shrink?
Is it those who don’t write Poetry?
Put it to vote like at the union hall.
The eyes have it.
You can be a putzer and a neurotic
as well as being ‘too smart for your own good,’ all at the same time.
I don’t twitch or shake.
I just never thought it OK simply being me.
But, it’s mighty OK with me, nowadays.
I keep petting my kitties and dog.
I look outside and see the sunny days
and the rainy ones
and it’s all OK
It’s all good.
It’s that way, now.
Oh, I forgot, we got some family therapy with my current wife and kids.
And, that was about ten years ago, I think.
Hey, it never hurts to talk to someone.
That’s all it really is.
Just like reading a book at the library.
You know, the shrinks don’t have the solution.
It rests with you.
After all, who’s life is it to live, anyway?
Hell, I’m sure he or she has their own problems.
Did you know the suicide rate for therapists is high?
Talking to disturbed people has it’s price.
Also, probably, it’s rewards.
But, you don’t make money that way
making people well.
It’s only when they keep coming to see you.
the only therapists I see who get rich are those on TV.
What’s his name?
No, Dr. P__L?
Oh, you know who I mean.
You can fill in the blanks.
(You know, all the ones who sold the profession down the river for their own financial gain. Will anyone miss them if they weren’t on TV? I wonder if they take their own advice?)
I still have my anger problem.
It didn’t go away.
Although, Some things do.
I have just learned not to do anything about it.
I mean, when I get angry.
I just write and live my life.
that’s all the action I take.
Jail time is not an option.
but, writing poetry and novels, always is.
It keeps me going
It keeps me sane.
Well, not actually sane.
If I were completely sane
I wouldn’t have anything to write about.
and, you wouldn’t be here with me now at the
bottom of this page…