Welcome to the Man Club;
that no holds barred psyche
where no wimp has gone before.
There is no leader but yourself
on a path no one has travelled.
It’s not easy being man.
No, not at all.
It might seem so,
because women I am not with now
had frequently told me how
easy it was to be a man,
and because of that, they’d like
to be one, too.
But, unfortunately, you don’t know how
easy it is until you are born man.
My God, does any man have a clue
what he’s in for when
he marries one of those
One thing I can say for sure;
he wouldn’t grow without
the wife and the kids
nagging and badgering
him to death…
Of course, no matter what they say,
no woman can be transformed into a male
through an operation.
(No hate mail, please!)
This is something which is self evident to me.
It’s a lonely job being man.
No boo hoo’s.
All men know this.
All men are against themselves.
There’s no formal schooling
the hard knocks
There’s no rites of passage
except beer, sex,
and rock n’ roll.
(Pretty pathetic pigeon holed schooling if you ask me.)
I didn’t say it wasn’t fun.
But, that was fifty years ago.
It would surely kill me now.
If I had any hankering left to do so.
(I guess I’m lucky I’m not as handsome as I used to be. Somehow, when you grow up, repeating wouldn’t be as fun. I’d have to tell you all about it
if I got another stab at it.)
Yet, All that doesn’t make you wise
deceptively holds your hand until you grow
And, deserts you to those who
are young, naïve, and ignorant.
Welcome to the man club,
my dear friend,
because it’s now your deal
passed onto you
as a torch
as you race around in circles
on that runner’s track
(sitting on the dock of the bay.)
You got handed a raw deal
whether you like it or not
from those old geezers before you
that screwed the whole world up
and dropped it in the innocent unknowing
like a hot potato
because they were too
busy providing what
to make her happy
(she cracked the whip on poor old grandpa
all those years until he shriveled up and died. Was she as sweet as we thought?
You’d have to ask granddad that. Well you can’t. He’s gone.
She seems to be doing just fine without the old fart, doing whatever it is old ladies do. They always seem to manage to get by. Don’t worry gramps, she’ll be following you as statistics show in about ten more years. You’re not off the hook yet, fella! She’s comin’ to get ya’.)
All those grandpas got off the hook
Maybe, maybe not…
That’s how everyone does it.
The buck gets passed, and then
I guess we’ll all get off the hook, someday.
Isn’t it nice knowing we can pass the buck, too?
God save your soul
you poor S.O.B.!
They’ll all tell you how great you were
and tip their hats to you
only when you’re dead and gone…
When all the S__T comes down,
who do they run to?
they come to you and me because we know what
We’re the men.
I’m the man.
You’re the man.
How lucky are we?
We fear no one.
Well, unless we’re chicken.
We can just fake it and act like
we are brave…
You can sign up for actor’s school and learn
and even get paid for lying.
They call that acting.
Strap on your seat belt before you
go on that ride
because as soon as you turn your head
someone’s goanna put a rope around your neck
and you’ll be a swingin’
from the highest limb
because you messed up
and weren’t politically correct
with those words which
blurted out of your mouth
when you got pissed off.
Sign up for that man school
where you have no model
to make yourself over with
except those violent, sexual, one dimensional male
stereotypes in the movies
who aren’t real anyway.
It’s all acting man!
It’s not real.
Of course, you knew that.
They are nothing we should be inspired to
They aren’t that way in real life.
(Except for Clint, of course.)
Maybe, they have a feminine side.
Maybe, even a bit more,
if you know what I mean…
(I don’t mean Clint.)
There are the real men who
can beat the piss out of someone
and make another man their bitch!
(One last time; again, not Clint.)
I think a lot of them are already in prison
recruiting their fresh new bitches every day.
Keep your nose clean so
you don’t have to face all those
hard assed real men in the pen!
But, what about becoming wise?
Doing the right thing?
I don’t think that’s taught.
(at least, not in prison.)
You can’t act that.
It has to be you.
It can’t be contrived.
There’s no school for that.
Does human kindness count these days
or is it just money and fame and material possessions?
(yet, you have to pay the bills. And, driving junky looking
cars, and eating crappy meals, and living in a crumby neighborhood, sucks!)
Helping someone without expecting
something in return?
How about helping someone in some small way
and they never know who it was who helped them?
Was all that just for Jesus and Buddha to do?
Is it Time to man-up and board up
all that anger inside until it festers
and the dam breaks and floods the valley
and drowns everyone below?
What’s the alternative?
say and do what you want
as long as
doesn’t hurt anyone-
It will show me what a nice person you are
and that the world is a better place
than I thought it was.
Some men want to join the
with all the fringe benefits,
They think being woman is the easy way
But, no, not me.
I was born male.
No one asked me.
I never want to be woman and
know what it’s like being one.
I’m Stuck in that man fraternity.
(Never tire watching reruns of
Clint’s old movies.)
That’s just the way it is.
Some things you
better get your
mind right to
get used to.
Pass it on…